Ah high school. The good ol’ years for some and for others… eh not so much. I remember high school like it was yesterday. For me, it those memories are a scant few years ago (more like 10). Still, the essays and tests are not far from my memory. Nor are the good times and the parties for that matter.

One thing I remember worrying about in high school (as my cousins now worry about), were sat prep courses. I felt like the SATs were the. biggest. test. of. achievement. ever. People I knew would take the prep courses and study hard. It was a big thing back then. Because having good SAT scores meant that good colleges would be easy to get into.

Back then, I thought the test was all by chance. Now however, I feel that if I would have “studied” for the SATs or taken a prep test, then perhaps I would have done better.

Did you study for your SATs?

I am so excited because a new family member will be added soon! My brother has announced that he and his wife are expecting their first child!

I have three children and sort of feel like I can be a help to her in this area. I’m not an expert by any means, but I definitely know what to expect when expecting! So, I have been giving her advice on things pregnancy related thus far. It has been fun!

One of her questions has been on where to order the baby announcements. I have relayed to her that she can find dozens of cute and affordable options online. I have also mentioned that she can make her own.

When you had your children, did you do baby announcements? If so, did you make them or buy them?

The hardest, most challenging and also rewarding thing that I am embarking on right now (aside from parenting and college), is the journey to lose weight.

I have been heavy most of my life. I have had a few spots here and there where I haven’t been heavy and also one successful stint in Onederland (165 baby!).

However, after becoming a parent, it seemed that the minute I thought about losing weight, I would get pregnant again. Or, I would still have a newborn at home. And believe me, it’s really hard to even think about losing weight when you are getting up for middle-of-the-night feedings!

When you are a mom, your life just isn’t your own. Especially when your children are younger. While I cherish my babies, sometimes at the end of the day, I feel physically and emotionally exhausted. Raising children is hard work — although very rewarding!

At one point I had thought about taking herbal diet pills or some sort of supplement to lose weight. Because I felt that I needed something to give me an edge.

Now, I make time for myself. I joined a gym that has daycare. And having a gym membership (especially one that offers childcare), is so important! I don’t feel guilty for taking an hour to myself and the kids have a change of pace!

If you are a mom, what do you think the most challenging thing about losing weight is?

I don’t know if it’s partly due to the big move, or the caffeine that I sometimes consume in the evening hours, but really… I feel so tired lately. This is largely due to some sleepless nights. For some reason, I wake up between 1 and 3 in the morning almost EVERY morning. It is annoying. Especially, if I wake up on my own (as in no help from the kids). I have started looking for the best sleep aids. I keep thinking that having a good sleeping pill on hand for when I am especially anxious is a good idea.

Do you use sleep aids? If so, do you like them?

There’s been so much going on. I don’t even know where to start. In a few weeks we will be moving. And though nothing is as good as written in stone yet, something inside tells me this will happen.

Recently, I found out that I will be an aunt for the first time! I am so excited! I am patiently waiting to find out whether or not it is a girl or boy.

Speaking of aunts, awhile back, one of my aunts thought that she might have arthritis. She looked over every shred of rheumatoid arthritis information that she could find. She is a hairdresser and her hands are vital to her work. She takes joint supplements to help counteract the effects of the arthritis. She just had a flare up the other day. Poor thing.

So that’s what has been going on in a nutshell!

Over the years, we have recorded video of our time as a family.  We try to capture the cute songs our children sing, or anything they did as a baby and basically Easter, Halloween, Christmas and any other holiday.  Kodak moments.  Our photo library is filled with almost 10,000 photos from 2004 to now.  Our aim is that we don’t want to miss a thing.  I have often thought of buying a camcorder. It would be nice to have something official to capture our moments on.

I am thinking that I would like to try something of digital nature.

Do you have a camcorder to capture all of your family moments? What do you think of it?

School has started back up for my son and for me as well. I have been going on somewhat of an emotional journey over the past few weeks. And it has been uplifting to say the least. This here blog will be getting a facelift and some much needed life breathed into it. I am going to change up the format a little bit. My life has changed so much since I started this blog in 2006. I changed jobs twice and then finally opted to stay at home with my babies until they were all in school full time. I had two more little ones added to my family. I have lost and gained weight. I have gained and lost friends. All within the course of about 4 years. So naturally, I feel this blog needs to grow beyond that. Because I have sort of grown away from it. I have good intentions of posting, but then I don’t. Because I wonder who is actually reading this. And lately, I just don’t feel I have much to say. Parenting is such a big deal for me, but one I try to keep private. And keeping your parenting life private sort of defeats the purpose of having a “mommy blog”.

So this blog will be moved into the “informational” genre, rather than personal diary. Because up until this point, that is what it was used for. So, after this point you will see “maintenance mode” at least once (but not sure when because as I said…school is back in session for me). I’m not on a medical travel or anything, nor am I taking a hiatus. More or less this blog will be under construction.

I need a vacation.  It doesn’t have to be anywhere super expensive.  Heck, even a trip to the bathroom uninterrupted would be great.  I just need to go someplace where my kids can’t find me for an hour. And maybe I can find some great weight loss supplements while I am at it. And if you throw in a charm bracelet, I will be your best friend forever.

Thanks a million.

Love,

Me

A year ago if you asked me if I would have baby fever anytime soon, I would have told you… “NOT A CHANCE”.   Because I have had babies every two years for the past 6 years.  But now that my youngest is growing more into a busy toddler and less of a snuggly baby, I find myself longing for a baby.

I have thought about getting a puppy, but it’s not the same thing.  Or is it?

I love having babies.  I just never liked the pregnancy part.  Especially after the first one.  Because when you are preggo, your body does not belong to you.  So you prepare yourself (once you’ve become a seasoned veteran at being pregnant) for an aching pelvis bone, lack of comfort in bed, and the fact that your ankles may very well swell up to the size of giant water balloons depending on the season you are most pregnant in.

But at the end of all of that, you have a tiny little screaming ball of love.  And giving birth seems to breathe new life into you (because with the sleepless nights, you’re going to need a breath of something).

And I long for that a little right now.

Does baby fever ever really go away?

I look at my little family and I marvel at how fast everyone is growing. My baby is 18 months now. It seems like just yesterday that I was on the exam table waiting for the doctor to confirm the results of the pregnancy test.

And i’m kind of sad that he is going to be my last baby. If you asked me how I felt a year ago… I would have told you to stick a fork in me because I was done having babies. But now that my little one is growing into an active toddler, I miss the baby phase.

I suppose I can always get a puppy. It’s not the same… but maybe that will help with the baby fever?

I feel like I accomplish as much as someone can who is in my position. I have three young children. Two of whom are home with me during the day and one in kindergarten. I am a far cry from Betty Crocker. The old saying “Your house should always look as if someone is coming over” doesn’t really work out for me much to the chagrin of my mother-in-law (she who exudes perfection).

Case in point.. today every time I cleaned up a mess, a new mess was made. Whenever my back was turned attending to “said messes”, toilets were being clogged, hair pins were strewn about and 100 sandwich bags glittered my kitchen floor like freezing rain on a tree.

I know that I should wait until the little ones are down for a nap… because that’s the logical and sane decision to make. I mean… you wouldn’t shovel snow while it was snowing… would you?

However, when they are down for a nap, I try to work on homework and the web-business. Dang… sometimes I even just take a little down time and stare at the wall (because staring at the wall is a totally normal activity for a stay-at-home mom right?). Fifteen minutes after putting them down for their daily nap, I heard a loud CRASH! come from the bedroom. I raced down the hall, very sure that someone would be bleeding. Much to my surprise, relief and horror…. I had two little eyes staring up at me in Brody’s crib — neither crying but both looking like they knew they were in trouble.

The long, short and skinny of it:

Soph decided to climb into Brody’s crib for a little sister-brother bonding time which consisted of jumping up and down like silly monkeys. It only took a couple of jumps and the crib straight up broke on one side, leaving an odd looking crib/slide. Thankfully, no one was hurt and I fixed the crib to the best of my ability (it is now lopsided and the different corners have different elevations because some pieces broke)…. thank God I can jimmy-rig like no one’s business!

I wish I could say that I was totally calm, but I yelled bit. And what’s worse, they both had poopy pants. I don’t know why that makes it worse but it just does.

By the end of all of that, I decided to induce wall-staring time. Because darn it, I was going to lose my cool (again) if one more thing happened.

Now I am blogging about it. But blogging about it makes me want to laugh… so I guess that’s a good thing.

Still, as I look around my house and see the disaster, it only reminds me of how much I have to get done before my husband gets home.

Thank God no one is coming over today!

Our middle child is a girl.  I had thought that with the middle child being of a different sex than the oldest and the youngest, that perhaps there wouldn’t be the sense of “missing out” or not being treated equally in terms of attention and … well… you name it.

But… it looks like I thought wrong.

My middle child is very conscious of “fairness” in the family.  More often than not, I find that she eyes up every instance to determine if she is missing out on something.  For example, I will hand out 3 plates of equal proportions for breakfast.  Her first instinct is to look at the other plates and check that they are equal to hers in everyway from portions to the content on the plate.  Once she feels satisfied that all is kosher, she digs in.  If, however, she finds that someone got something different (for example, O hates eggs… so I give him more meat or a piece of fruit or something in substitution), she immediately squawks.  She will ask (though it comes out in a demand) to also have what he has.

I try the best I can to make sure that everything is fair.  But with the differing ages and such, each child has differing priveledges.   I have put into place where I do something special with each one of them individually once a week.

Still, it gets frustrating when one of your children feel a little jilted.

How do you other moms and dads handle this?

As I mentioned before, we have been house hunting.  To date, we have made 6 offers on homes.   4 of which did not turn out  (Two HUD homes –lost bid,  1 owner not willing to negotiate and a short sale not willing to go FHA) and two that we are waiting to hear back on.  We  have seen the inside of maybe 60 homes and have looked at over 100.  In this economy, you would think that we would have an easy time of finding a home and would be on our way to closing the deal on a house.  But, I think fate has other ideas.  Because almost every deal has fallen through or we were outbid.

Like a lot of first-time home buyers, we are racing to the finish line to be able to take advantage of the amazing tax-credit.  To say that I was frustrated I think I would be an understatement of my feelings.  I am devastatingly frustrated.  There… I said it.  After 4 offers turned down (or lost to higher bidders), you start to feel a little cynical and downtrodden on this whole “buying a house” business.  I have gone over in my head a thousand times what we did wrong.  Should we have sent pictures of our kids?  Heartfelt letters of intent?  Made the offers without a realtor?  In the end, I realize that there is no answer for it.  It is what it is –the official catch phrase for 2009.

Inside, I feel anxious and panic-stricken.  I want to be in a house by the holidays.  Not to mention, the owner of the house we are currently renting is itching to sell once and for all.  So perhaps, with all of this I feel a little under the gun.

I should feel blessed to have the opportunity to buy a home when so many others are losing theirs.  I should find some kind of blessing at my good fortune and heartfelt sorrow for the misfortune of others.  But in all honesty, I only feel panic.

School is starting back up for me this week.  I’m a little nervous about my Algebra class but am hoping to get through it without too much of  a problem.  I can bullshit my way through almost anything… things math related however, not so much.

O is enjoying school.  Kindergarten keeps him busy and occupies his mind Monday through Friday now.  He has made at least one friend and likes his teacher.  He is adjusting to his new schedule with the rapid ease of being a little kid.  The other two miss him so much while he is gone.  Soph is his little shadow when he comes home from school and Brody also begs to be included.  Although B has the misfortune of being the little brother so he is not included in much of what the other kids do.  He tries though…

It’s nearing the time to pick Owen up from school…

Until next time…

Being a mom and wife is amazing.  When I was a little girl I used to dream about how amazing it would be to have all of these people in my life who would love me without question and who would be with me always.  A family is one that needs to stick together and inevitably this is what is supposed to happen.

I have a tendancy to romanticize things.  Because the reality is that as rewarding as it is to be a mom and a wife (and whatever else), it takes a lot of hard work and effort.

Sometimes, in the process of this thing called life, I feel a little lost.  As much as I love being a mom (and I adore and love my children) and love being a wife (my husband is my rock.)… I still feel at times, like I am lost.  Who am I?  I am one who fills all of these shoes and tries to be what everyone needs.

But lately, I have come to grasp the knowledge that in my quest for making everyone else happy and feel fulfilled, I am downright gasping for air.  My health is declining and i’m in a constant state of worry and panic that this house made of cards (or so it seems at times), will come crashing down.

Ever have those days?

The kids and I have a fun day planned. We are going to the Children’s Museum for a few hours today and then I think i’m going to take them out to lunch. Indoor fun is exactly what is needed because it is raining here today.

The Museum is so interactive and the kids always love it when we go there! It’s even fun for parents! One of my favorite sections is their grocery store. They have a realistic barcode scanner, cash register, and realistic looking food as well!

Here’s to a fun-filled day! )

Yep, i’m going to say it…. it’s been a craptastic week over here on the compound.  I was down for most of the week with a kidney infection.  Then, I had about 2 days of repreive and relief from that but now i’m fighting a cold.  Husb got sick in the middle of the week with bronchitis and so he’s recovering from that.  The kids are all coughing with fevers, so i’ll probably have to take them to see the doctor tomorrow.  I hate being sick.  What’s worse, I hate it when the house is sick.

We learned that husb’s uncle has to have an AED Defibrillator. He’s not doing so hot. He is currently on a waiting list for a new heart. I am praying that he can hold out but the Lord might have other plans.

So that was my week. How was yours?

It has been a weird week on the compound. First, we went up north for a few days over the Easter Holiday and I frickin’ lost my cell phone (but my aunt called today to tell me that she found it *whew*). Then, husb came down with bronchitis when we returned on Monday. On Tuesday husb stayed home from work (which threw my whole day off). Today was a little better despite the doctors appointment for Brodykins (which went rather well… but I hate it when my babies get shots).

The weather is warming up here. It was 66° today and promises to be even nicer tomorrow! I was able to get the kids outside and they ran around the yard dispelling all of their pent up cabin fever in the process. Even Brody took a tumble in the grass.

I learned from a neighbor that some vandalism was reported in our neck of the woods. That got me to thinking about installing a home alarm. I wouldn’t think that we’d need one being this far from civilization, but you just never know I guess.

So all of the little changes have me thrown for a loop. This of course means that i’m having the worst week with my diet.

Anywho, I look forward to the weekend with zest. Hopefully, husb will feel back to top form so that we can all take a bike ride on Saturday.

How is your week so far?

So, everything is going wrong this week.

By everything, I mean:

1.  Sick kids. (again)

2.  Lap top broke (i’ve only had it for a week).

3.  and because of #1 and #2 I am falling behind on my first week in one of my classes.  For a six week class, falling behind on the first week is a death sentence.

I want to cry and stamp my feet.  Or better yet, hide under the bed with the covers pulled tightly over my head.  Still, I trudge on.  I’m trying to decide if I should drop my class now or wait it out.  I don’t want to have my GPA be adversely affected by a bout of Murphy’s Law, so I may just decide to drop the class.  Still, I am unsure as to what effect that will have on my financial aid.

So I guess I can sum up all of this mucky muck with one word.  Oy.

Do you hear that?  Nope.  Me either.

The noises we are not hearing:

~Throwing up

~Lots of crying

What we are not smelling:

~Loaded diapers (every half hour on the half hour).

The end of this week has brought some semi-normalcy to the compound again.  I even managed to get the laundry caught up!  Which, if you know me is a feat anyway… sickies or no sickies.

Not only did I manage to get the laundry caught up but I also managed to finish setting up the business billing system, appropriate e-mail addresses and am *thisclose* to having the site finished!

I weigh in at WW tomorrow and am hoping for at least a 1 lb lost!  *fingers crossed*  This has been a rather stressful week though so I won’t be surprised if it doesn’t happen.

TGIF!

All of the little ones are sick in our household.  Loads of dirty diapers and throw-up to go around.  I feel so bad for them.  When one finishes getting sick, the other one starts.  So our washing machine has been getting a workout.

My middle child (aka… Miss Busy girl) just wants to snuggle under blankies and suck her paci, and that’s it.  It is not like her to sit still for 10 minutes let alone a few hours.  She listlessly stares at the shows on PBS Sprout with a sad look in her eyes.  Poor girl.

The little one wants to move around so badly.  But he too is not feeling well and so just wants to be held.

Bleh.  I hate the sickies.  It doesn’t happen very often around here so when it does happen, it completely rocks our world but not in a good way.

So, i’m just sitting here, snuggling with my babies, watching PBS Sprout and hoping that the sickies will go away soon.