Well folks, I will officially be 36 weeks on Monday. This means I have approximately three weeks to go before I meet the final addition to our family. I cannot even begin to tell you how this pregnancy has brought about so much joy and sadness, making it bittersweet.
I have to admit that when I first found out I was pregnant with this little one I was in shock, disbelief and completely wrought with feelings of devastation. Sophiekat at the time was only 9 months old and had just begun sleeping through the night about one month prior. I wasn’t ready. What’s more, my husband and I had figured that we were done cultivating our family. Like stick a fork in us done. The only thing is, I chose not to get my tubes tied when Sophiekat was born. Something deep within told me that I would regret it and the timing wasn’t right for it.
I love being a mom and I LOVE my children so much! Though this pregnancy definitely took some getting used to (I was fine after a month). Because even though I knew in my heart of hearts that I did want one more; 9 months after my second baby was not an ideal time. Or maybe it was. Looking back, I think this was the best time for it to happen.
Now my husband and I are so excited about this new addition to our family! This little one will make us feel “complete”.
Though in a way it is a happy-sad time for me. I signed the forms to get my tubes tied this time. I am 150% sure that I am done having kids. Still, putting an end to this chapter in my life is kind of sad. I’ll never feel another life growing inside of me. I’ll never have the excitement of “what should we name him/her?” or the excitement of going to the hospital to meet the newest love of my life. It’s amazing all of the wonderful things pregnancy and having children bring to someone’s life! It is truly a blessing and a miracle! For a time, I was apart of that miracle! I was blessed by God.
The other half of this period is that I am excited. I will have my little family and raise my children with my husband. We can move forward with other things now. I can get my body back to the way I want it. Now, we can enjoy being a completed family!
So, i’m going to enjoy the last few weeks of my pregnancy. I’m going to cherish every moment!
Last pregnancy… bittersweet.